There are very few people in the world who can look back over the previous year and be completely happy with every single thing they’ve achieved. Your sex life is no different – there’s always room for improvement and experimentation.
Don’t be too harsh on yourself if you haven’t done it as often as you wanted, or if you never got around to trying that new sex position. You still have a lot of time ahead to try out new ways to ramp up the excitement in bed.
New Year’s resolutions are all about addressing what you want to change and making it happen.
The key to making resolutions that you actually stick to is to make them achievable and fun.
Putting too much pressure on yourself rarely works, so think of some simple but effective things you can do to make small but significant changes that add up to better sex. Start small and uncomplicated, instead of being too ambitious right off the bat.
Here are our suggestions…
Try reading erotica (great for getting you in the mood and giving you a few new ideas to try out), or read it aloud to your partner (but be warned, you may not make it to the end of the page before things get heated, so be prepared to get right into it as the mood builds!)
You could even try writing your own erotica and giving it to each other to read – it’s a great way to talk about fantasies if you find saying things face-to-face awkward or embarrassing.
Think about the scene you’re setting before sex – if you’ve been arguing over money or are exhausted from work, you’re probably not going to be in the best frame of mind to have satisfying sex with your partner. If you’re upset, take some time to cool off. Spend some time being kind to each other, talk calmly without reverting to whatever has upset either of you, and remember to show plenty of affection. A better relationship always results in better sex.
Have you been meaning to try having sex in the shower?? There’s no time like the present to try it and have fun while doing so!
If you’ve always been a fumble-in-the-sack-before-bed kind of couple, now is the time to shake things up a bit.
Try setting an alarm for some early-morning fun, or put your to-do list aside and indulge in a bit of afternoon delight for one weekend. You will be amazed at the difference it makes to your sex life.
When you’ve been with your partner for a while you can forget the simple things, such as flirting or meaningful eye contact. If you get that right, the rest can follow more naturally.
So spend a little time wooing your partner by sending a flirty text, whispering a few saucy suggestions in their ear, or taking time to talk (and listen). After all this, better sex will automatically follow.
All too often sex becomes a routine that you work your way through.
Forget autopilot and slow things right down and please your partner by searching out their erogenous zones and paying them some attention (hint: try behind the ears, behind the knee and the inside of the arm).
We all have our favourite positions in bed, but these can become the same old dependable positions time and again. Predictability breeds boredom pretty soon!
If body confidence or inexperience are making you think twice about trying a new position, talk to your partner first and work up to different positions gradually. This will build your confidence.
With a few simple changes you can have much better sex and also pleasing both your partner and you. Soon, you will be on the way to the best year yet for your sex life.
So, go ahead and pick a few simple and achievable resolutions, and have fun while trying to achieve them. When better sex follows, you will find it easier to stick to your resolutions.